I am taking the lead of my sister here, and chronicling a performance that I really enjoyed so I can throw the paper program away.
This was a recital in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the DMA degree in performance at Michigan State University. One of my good friends from Iowa State, Andrew Sprung had his first recital (out of two required) for his PhD in clarinet performance tonight.
All performers on the program included:
Heather Peyton, Oboe
Andrew Sprung, Clarinet
Yeh-Chi-Wang, Bassoon
Bryan Guarnuccio, Flute
Jason Gridley-Waters, Horn
I will be attaching random (not of this event) youtube videos that may expire in time (as they usually do), so feel free to search these up on Youtube if the links don't work by the time you get here.
Summer Music, Op. 31, by Samuel Barber (1910-1981)
Divertissement, by Jean Françaix (1912-1997)
Prélude & Allegretto assai
Elégie & Scherzo
Kvintet, Op. 43, by Carl Nielsen (1865-1931)
Allegro ben moderato
Menuet *This was my favorite movement - it seems to be built around 6-count segments that flow seamlessly one to the next.**
Preludium; Tema con variazioni
Enjoy! And now I will throw my program away.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Azeroth Quotes, World of Warcraft
I'm making fortune cookies for the BlizzCon LiveFeed party we're having this weekend.... I had to compile this list from many sources, so here's a nice concise reference for fortunes.
You will soon find that your combat matrix has been enhanced by bloodlust.
MANY WHELPS!
That's a minus 50 DKP!
Leeeeeroy Jeeeeeeeenkins!
Your faction will win Wintergrasp before the month is out.
Your gear score is pitiful. Consider a long walk off Aldor Rise.
You no take candle!
Be prepared to be struck by lightning where the sun doesn't shine.
Your mana pool is pitiful. Consider a long walk off the Ratchet pier.
This kingdom shall fall, and from the ashes shall rise a new order that will shake the very foundations of the world.
The hope for future generations has always resided in mortal hands.
Now that your task is done, like Medivh, you shall take your place amongst the legends of the past.
I salute your bravery, elf, but the chase is over.
You're the king? Well, I didn't vote for you.
You have been chosen by the big metal hand in the sky! Do not fail us!
Side effects may include dry mouth, nausea, vomiting, water retention, painful rectal itch, hallucination, dementia, psychosis, coma, death, and halitosis. Magic is not for everyone. Consult your doctor before use.
If you don't master your anger, your anger will master you.
The strands of destiny weave only a web of death.
I am he who watches they. I am the fist of retribution. That which does quell the recalcitrant. Dare you defy the Warchief? Dare you face my merciless judgment?
The beginning of wisdom is the statement 'I do not know.' The person who cannot make that statement is one who will never learn anything.
You can't call yourself a seasoned adventurer until you've spent some time killing rats! Haw!
Hmm those pig creatures are unlike anything I've ever seen before - - At least they're prettier than you, human.
I come from the Orcs. We eat with spoons and forks. We love to eat our pork!"
Your pain shall be legendary!
You like large posteriors and you cannot prevaricate.
Kill the healer first, the one in the dress!
Would you like to know the secret to eternal happiness? Page 236...
"My blood cries out for the vengeance of my people's blood, which can only be repaid with at least twice as much blood! Or maybe three times as much blood! Like, if you went to hell, and it was full of blood, and that blood was on fire, and it was raining blood, then maybe that would be enough blood! Eh... but probably not."
By the gods you're annoying.
You may soon join a cult - not so much a cult, as a fanatical group of bloodthirsty, blade-wielding zealots.
Nibly the Almighty says: Silence, servant! Vengeance will be mine! Death to Stormwind! Death by chicken
"My older brother, Magni, is King of the Dwarves. My younger brother, Brann, is a renowned explorer. If I didn't kick so much ass, I'd feel a tad awkward. " -Muradin
I love the smell of exorcism in the morning... you know that smell? That smell of burning undead... it smells... like victory.
Your heroism brings all the boys to the yard.
Orc females have no respect for people with small peircings. I say go full hog- put a spear through your head!
The way to a man's heart, be through his stomach. But trolls go through da ribcage!
Robin Hood steals from the Humans and gives to the ..... Murlocs! Why else do you think they are so rich?
The amount of available bag space is inversely proportional to the amount of loot you will receive when running an instance. Pack light.
You will soon find that your combat matrix has been enhanced by bloodlust.
MANY WHELPS!
That's a minus 50 DKP!
Leeeeeroy Jeeeeeeeenkins!
Your faction will win Wintergrasp before the month is out.
Your gear score is pitiful. Consider a long walk off Aldor Rise.
You no take candle!
Be prepared to be struck by lightning where the sun doesn't shine.
Your mana pool is pitiful. Consider a long walk off the Ratchet pier.
This kingdom shall fall, and from the ashes shall rise a new order that will shake the very foundations of the world.
The hope for future generations has always resided in mortal hands.
Now that your task is done, like Medivh, you shall take your place amongst the legends of the past.
I salute your bravery, elf, but the chase is over.
You're the king? Well, I didn't vote for you.
You have been chosen by the big metal hand in the sky! Do not fail us!
Side effects may include dry mouth, nausea, vomiting, water retention, painful rectal itch, hallucination, dementia, psychosis, coma, death, and halitosis. Magic is not for everyone. Consult your doctor before use.
If you don't master your anger, your anger will master you.
The strands of destiny weave only a web of death.
I am he who watches they. I am the fist of retribution. That which does quell the recalcitrant. Dare you defy the Warchief? Dare you face my merciless judgment?
The beginning of wisdom is the statement 'I do not know.' The person who cannot make that statement is one who will never learn anything.
You can't call yourself a seasoned adventurer until you've spent some time killing rats! Haw!
Hmm those pig creatures are unlike anything I've ever seen before - - At least they're prettier than you, human.
I come from the Orcs. We eat with spoons and forks. We love to eat our pork!"
Your pain shall be legendary!
You like large posteriors and you cannot prevaricate.
Kill the healer first, the one in the dress!
Would you like to know the secret to eternal happiness? Page 236...
"My blood cries out for the vengeance of my people's blood, which can only be repaid with at least twice as much blood! Or maybe three times as much blood! Like, if you went to hell, and it was full of blood, and that blood was on fire, and it was raining blood, then maybe that would be enough blood! Eh... but probably not."
By the gods you're annoying.
You may soon join a cult - not so much a cult, as a fanatical group of bloodthirsty, blade-wielding zealots.
Nibly the Almighty says: Silence, servant! Vengeance will be mine! Death to Stormwind! Death by chicken
"My older brother, Magni, is King of the Dwarves. My younger brother, Brann, is a renowned explorer. If I didn't kick so much ass, I'd feel a tad awkward. " -Muradin
I love the smell of exorcism in the morning... you know that smell? That smell of burning undead... it smells... like victory.
Your heroism brings all the boys to the yard.
Orc females have no respect for people with small peircings. I say go full hog- put a spear through your head!
The way to a man's heart, be through his stomach. But trolls go through da ribcage!
Robin Hood steals from the Humans and gives to the ..... Murlocs! Why else do you think they are so rich?
The amount of available bag space is inversely proportional to the amount of loot you will receive when running an instance. Pack light.
Friday, August 20, 2010
My baby kitty
Meet 7 month old Edwin! We picked him up at the shelter after Hunter passed on.
This was too cute not to photograph!
He loves to play hide n go seek, and in the morning he loves a little lactose free milk.
Also, he loves having his teeth brushed, and he loves that I eat salmon out of the can and share the juice with him. He's my buddy.
This was too cute not to photograph!
He loves to play hide n go seek, and in the morning he loves a little lactose free milk.
Also, he loves having his teeth brushed, and he loves that I eat salmon out of the can and share the juice with him. He's my buddy.
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Recipe adaptation: slow cooker chicken posole
This is one of those ID10T users at allrecipes.com things, where I have taken the recipe and changed EVERY! SINGLE! THING! and still expect you to believe that the original is awesome. I must apologize, but I tend to work from what I have instead of reinventing my pantry for every new recipe.
We'll see how this turns out, I'm sure we'll love it, we love spicy food.
You can find the original here: Slow Cooker Chicken Posole
Ingredients:
1 can (29 oz) white hominy, drained
1 can (16 oz) sliced stewed tomatoes
1 can (16 oz) red enchilada sauce (hot)
1 can (12 oz) carrots, sliced
2 small onions, chopped
4 TBSP minced bottled garlic
1 tsp cumin
4 chicken thighs, skin on
Pepper
Jalapeno peppers (3), sliced, seeds in
Dried cilantro
Lime wedges
Tortilla chips
Recipe Preparation
1. Combine hominy, tomatoes, enchilada sauce, carrots, onion, jalapenos, lime wedges, garlic and cumin in a 4-qt slow-cooker. Add chicken and stir to combine. Cover and cook on high 3 to 3 1⁄2 hours until chicken is cooked through and vegetables tender. Skim and discard any fat from the surface.
2. Remove chicken; pull meat off bones into large shreds. Stir back into slow-cooker. Stir in cilantro, if using. Serve with more lime wedges and tortilla chips.
We'll see how this turns out, I'm sure we'll love it, we love spicy food.
You can find the original here: Slow Cooker Chicken Posole
Ingredients:
1 can (29 oz) white hominy, drained
1 can (16 oz) sliced stewed tomatoes
1 can (16 oz) red enchilada sauce (hot)
1 can (12 oz) carrots, sliced
2 small onions, chopped
4 TBSP minced bottled garlic
1 tsp cumin
4 chicken thighs, skin on
Pepper
Jalapeno peppers (3), sliced, seeds in
Dried cilantro
Lime wedges
Tortilla chips
Recipe Preparation
1. Combine hominy, tomatoes, enchilada sauce, carrots, onion, jalapenos, lime wedges, garlic and cumin in a 4-qt slow-cooker. Add chicken and stir to combine. Cover and cook on high 3 to 3 1⁄2 hours until chicken is cooked through and vegetables tender. Skim and discard any fat from the surface.
2. Remove chicken; pull meat off bones into large shreds. Stir back into slow-cooker. Stir in cilantro, if using. Serve with more lime wedges and tortilla chips.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Everything'll be alright
Something about getting scratched by my cat really messed my head up last night-- Joshua himself says it'll all be ok.
Books close when they are finished.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
song of the moment - Iron and Wine
God made the automobile to pass all the pretty girls that smoke by the side of the road, their blues lovin' boys in tow; to drive until the end of the day, and bow to a borrowed flag beside all the brave and the blind, and men without men in mind.
To pass all the things he made but then never bothered to name. And no one will tell the truth, and no one will hide it from you, like birds around the grave.
God made the automobile, and I made a little boy to pass all the blissfully young.
The snake with the forked toungue that prays on the waiting for time, and makes in the sleepless waves, the fear of the black and the jew, and blood for the camera crew.
It passes the things he made and then never bothered to name. And no one will tell the truth, and no one will hide it from you, like birds around the grave.
To pass all the things he made but then never bothered to name. And no one will tell the truth, and no one will hide it from you, like birds around the grave.
God made the automobile, and I made a little boy to pass all the blissfully young.
The snake with the forked toungue that prays on the waiting for time, and makes in the sleepless waves, the fear of the black and the jew, and blood for the camera crew.
It passes the things he made and then never bothered to name. And no one will tell the truth, and no one will hide it from you, like birds around the grave.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
New Chapter
So, this job that gave me the iritis with the stress? I was relieved of it this morning.
I feel so relieved. And so sick with a cold.
Once I'm all the way better, I'd like to work on things that mean something to me, as well as finding a job that fits my heart and my head better.
I feel so relieved. And so sick with a cold.
Once I'm all the way better, I'd like to work on things that mean something to me, as well as finding a job that fits my heart and my head better.
Monday, August 9, 2010
Blue Monday
Well, I'm fighting off a cold today. We have some fierce storms happening, too. I wish I could just stay home and rest- oh well, only 3 more hrs and I'll be done.
Here's to Monday!!
Here's to Monday!!
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Iritis
I currently have iritis, have had it for over a week now. I got it last Tuesday, following a bad review at my new bank job on Friday, July 24. I've been at this job since March and I haven't had much in the way of coaching, so I was lucky they decided to keep me. But it also stressed me out, because I don't deal well with imperfection or failure, or "not being good enough".
Hence the iritis. I went to the eye doctor on July 29, and they put me on prednisolone drops, once an hour (left eye), and a dilating drop to take twice a day (I take it every 12 hours). After a week, I didn't feel any better, the doctor said it didn't look any better, and since this is the FIFTH FUCKING TIME I've had this, and each time the drops do not better my condition. The first 3 times I had a steroid injection under my cornea, and the most recent time (following the death of my grandfather and following into the death of my sister's husband), they put me on oral steroids, and I improved rapidly. Not to mention the rest of my pain- and inflammatory- disease riddled body. My pain decreased to the point where I felt normal, happy, energetic. Not bogged down by pain.
So the doctor asked me what I wanted to do next, whether I wanted to continue one more week on drops alone, or... add oral steroids. Given my history with the disease, I didn't want to spend one more week feeling the way I do when I have iritis: isolated, alone, scared, angry, helpless, in pain. I know the oral steroids work, and they work rapidly. So I'm on day 2 of oral steroids, and I feel wonderful. I'm at 40 mg right now, and they'll taper me off once I improve. I'm still taking the steroid drop once per hour, and once I improve, they'll taper the drops first, and then the pills.
I'm doing well, despite the iritis. I'm managing to be confident and sell products, I'm managing to be friendly and warm with customers despite my highly dilated left eye and the pain I feel while I'm straining to read their deposit slip.
How did a musician of my caliber (double bass player) end up as a bank teller, anyway? It doesn't seem fair. Then again, life rarely is.
Hence the iritis. I went to the eye doctor on July 29, and they put me on prednisolone drops, once an hour (left eye), and a dilating drop to take twice a day (I take it every 12 hours). After a week, I didn't feel any better, the doctor said it didn't look any better, and since this is the FIFTH FUCKING TIME I've had this, and each time the drops do not better my condition. The first 3 times I had a steroid injection under my cornea, and the most recent time (following the death of my grandfather and following into the death of my sister's husband), they put me on oral steroids, and I improved rapidly. Not to mention the rest of my pain- and inflammatory- disease riddled body. My pain decreased to the point where I felt normal, happy, energetic. Not bogged down by pain.
So the doctor asked me what I wanted to do next, whether I wanted to continue one more week on drops alone, or... add oral steroids. Given my history with the disease, I didn't want to spend one more week feeling the way I do when I have iritis: isolated, alone, scared, angry, helpless, in pain. I know the oral steroids work, and they work rapidly. So I'm on day 2 of oral steroids, and I feel wonderful. I'm at 40 mg right now, and they'll taper me off once I improve. I'm still taking the steroid drop once per hour, and once I improve, they'll taper the drops first, and then the pills.
I'm doing well, despite the iritis. I'm managing to be confident and sell products, I'm managing to be friendly and warm with customers despite my highly dilated left eye and the pain I feel while I'm straining to read their deposit slip.
How did a musician of my caliber (double bass player) end up as a bank teller, anyway? It doesn't seem fair. Then again, life rarely is.
My latest desktop background
I love the sleekness of apple products, but they generally lack the robustness required to play massive multiplayer online games. I love world of warcraft and fluffy fox es, and so I put this delicious piece of irony on my PC desktop. I like to enjoy the best of both worlds. And the cosmic wonder of this indigo sky spotted with stars- stargazing really is the best thing in the world.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Super cool giveaway!
Please go here for a chance to win some beautiful jewelry on behalf of a great cause!!!
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Living with a cluster of auto-immune disorders
Peak symptoms:
Iritis:
My right eye had severe pain with any sunlight or strong light. The pain was in the eye itself, and then in the tissues surrounding the eye, from having to blink a lot and close my eye for direct light. The left eye began having pain as time went on because it had to compensate for the right eye so much. My face hurt a lot.
With the cyclopentate, my eye was dilated to keep the eye from scarring. This made it hard to focus on close-up work, made it difficult to actually read. I'm lucky that I have excellent symbol-interpreting skills, so I could "guess" correctly at what was on the page. But it exhausted me. Driving was also a challenge. But I did it, and I have a very good knack for being careful and interpreting the symbols in the traffic, so even though my eyes were not focusing together, I could figure out what was going on. But it gave me headaches. And the bright light of the setting sun after work really made my eye twinge and water.
Driving at night was virtually impossible, because of the dilation: eyes use light to gauge shape and distance, right? Well, with the dilated right eye, all the light came straight in and there was no depth perception. Especially at night. So I'd be driving to the store for something (just around the block, thankfully), but I couldn't tell how FAR the headlights were from me. I literally couldn't SEE that. I couldn't interpret distance. So I began counting. I would count tiny moments and with that, I could create an artificial frame of reference with which I could guess how far the other cars were and how fast they were moving, because I couldn't tell with my eyes any of that. It was scary, but I managed to make it work. It was very exhausting.
And to top that off, I looked funny. My right eye was often red from the constant drops, and the pupil was very large. I was thinking about going for job interviews, but I was sure they wouldn't understand about my dilated pupil and red rimmed right eye.
Medication: The prednisolone drops taste like bitter lettuce. I can taste it down the back of my throat, on the back of my tongue. They also make me feel very isolated from mankind. It's like I'm in a transparent latex bubble. I feel muted, like an emotionless shell. I also feel like people don't understand me while I'm taking the drop. I took it once an hour while awake (14-16 drops per day) for 1-2 weeks, then tapered down to 8 times a day, 7, 6, 5, 4, and then I stopped of my own volition because I could tell that the swelling was all gone. I've done this so many times that it's so familiar, the symptoms and the cessation of symptoms.
The prednisolone pill made all my swelling go away. I was having swelling in my ankles, knees, back, sternum, hips, and I was starting to get joint pain in my hands. I'm a musician, so that was utterly scary to me. But the oral prednisolone took away all swelling. The only side effects I had were increased metabolism (I already have a killer metabolism), I was hungry ALL THE TIME, and I had VERY VIVID dreams, some of them scary. It kept me from sleeping soundly at night when I was on the 40mg dose. But it made all my pain/symptoms go away.
I was on 40mg for one week, then 30 mg, then 20, then 10, then 5, then none.
Colitis:
Whenever I traveled, I got diarrhea. I also struggled with what I thought was lactose intolerance. But when I take Humira, I don't have any trouble digesting lactose.
I never thought that my "lactose intolerance" would have more to do with colitis than with lactose.
Lactose intolerance symptoms:
I would have very bad diarrhea, and I would feel "hungover" the next morning, very dehydrated and I would have trouble moving. When I ate a lot of ice cream and pizza, my tummy would hurt, and I would get very fatigued and start to go to sleep, and I would wake up with intense pain in my abdomen, and I wouldn't be able to walk very well for 30 minutes or so.
Ankylosing spondylitis symptoms:
I began having back pain back in 2005. I thought it was because I had a back injury- I hit my back on a loft while I was standing on a futon in college. My vertebrae T5-T9 were "out", and then I got really bad hip pain. I did physical therapy for 6 months, and then they let me go because I was "getting better" -- but I had all kinds of pain when I tried to sleep, and I used to be a really fast walker, but I had to stop because of my back pain. I still don't walk really fast.
I had to take 800mg of ibuprofen every 8 hours in order to survive life. I would wake up in the middle of the night, every night, in pain, and I'd have to take ibuprofen and still wouldn't sleep really well. I took the daily 2400mg of ibuprofen for 12-14 months, until I got on Humira.
Another thing about the pain: the more stress I'm under, the worse my pain will be. If my mood is bad, the pain is worse.
This latest episode of back pain started back in October 2007. I was having lots of pain at night, and for my job I was lifting 30 lb string basses all day. I was sure the pain would go away, so I did the stretches I learned from my '05 therapy, and didn't want to bother anyone with my back pain. I finally went to the doctor in March of '08, and I got physical therapy, but the effects didn't last. I would get better "in session", and then I'd wake up the next morning with pain. I also discovered that playing the bass made my back hurt more. My job entailed lifting basses and playing them to ensure they were adjusted properly. So my work worsened the situation.
I was released from physical therapy May of '08. My symptoms still weren't much better, but I was "getting better." My spine wouldn't "flex" the way it should, and I was having a lot of pain sleeping at night.
My maternal grandfather passed away Aug 24, 2008. I got on a plane that weekend and I got diarrhea really badly, which I know now was my colitis acting up. I stayed with my sister Natalie and her brand-new husband Michael for most of the three-day event, but the last night I stayed with my sister Nichole and her husband Jeff. They said some things that really upset me, and I got iritis the next day on the plane. I was sure it was nothing, though, maybe pink eye... but the next morning I couldn't see very well out my right eye. I went to the Ann Arbor Kellogg Eye Center Urgent Care, and they had the sense to get me tested for HLA-B27. I've had iritis 3 times previously in my life, once in 1998 (left eye), 1999 (right eye), and again in 2001 (left eye). In all 3 cases they started with prenisolone eye drops, then after a month of no improvement, I was given a prednisolone injection in the eye, which stopped the symptoms.
By this point, my ankles had swollen, and both knees, so it was hard to walk. I'd been to the doctor twice for this but they couldn't tell me what was wrong. It was actually the tissue connecting to the joints, not the joints themselves, so it was very confusing.
Peak AS symptoms: I couldn't bend down to pet the cat. She would greet me every morning when I left the bedroom, and she'd roll on the floor so I could pet her tummy-- but when I was having flares, I physically could not touch my toes without severe pain. I couldn't twist from side to side, I would have trouble laughing because all the spots where my ribs meet my sternum were inflamed, so it hurt to laugh. When I was in physical therapy, my physical therapist told me that my ribs were supposed to "roll" as I bent over. They weren't moving, so I was in extreme pain in my chest/back all the time. The ribs were locked in the position they are in when you are sitting upright, and when I would bend forward, they would stay in that position, which was VERY painful. Sometimes I would have trouble breathing, just asthma-like symptoms that worsened at night when the pain was worse. It felt like I couldn't take deep breaths, and if I started coughing, I would have trouble stopping coughing because I felt out of breath.
It hurt to walk. I had trouble walking up and down stairs, because my knees hurt so badly. The funny thing was, if I walked for hours, it would hurt while I was walking, but I would be in less pain later on, probably because of increased blood flow and some increased joint mobility.
My hands hurt. It felt like a searing, white hot pain in all my joints. This pain depressed me and made it hard for me to focus on anything. I would sit for hours, not really doing anything, but not wanting to move because of all the pain in my joints. The one thing that stopped my hand pain temporarily was washing dishes. The hot water and joint movement helped take the pain away for a while.
It hurt to lift things, because every joint ached, and my spine wasn't moving, so all the weight wasn't being distributed properly.
Symptom-free living:
I can bend down and pet the kitty. I can do housework without having pain. I can play the bass without pain. I can lift things and not ache for days afterward. I can sleep without chest/back pain. I can get up out of bed without pain. I can sit on the floor without fear of not being able to get back up. I can go to almost any position, lying down, etc, without fear of not being able to get up without help.
I don't have to worry about not being able to see, either up close or driving. I don't have to worry so much about what I eat, because on Humira, lactose doesn't give me symptoms.
Iritis:
My right eye had severe pain with any sunlight or strong light. The pain was in the eye itself, and then in the tissues surrounding the eye, from having to blink a lot and close my eye for direct light. The left eye began having pain as time went on because it had to compensate for the right eye so much. My face hurt a lot.
With the cyclopentate, my eye was dilated to keep the eye from scarring. This made it hard to focus on close-up work, made it difficult to actually read. I'm lucky that I have excellent symbol-interpreting skills, so I could "guess" correctly at what was on the page. But it exhausted me. Driving was also a challenge. But I did it, and I have a very good knack for being careful and interpreting the symbols in the traffic, so even though my eyes were not focusing together, I could figure out what was going on. But it gave me headaches. And the bright light of the setting sun after work really made my eye twinge and water.
Driving at night was virtually impossible, because of the dilation: eyes use light to gauge shape and distance, right? Well, with the dilated right eye, all the light came straight in and there was no depth perception. Especially at night. So I'd be driving to the store for something (just around the block, thankfully), but I couldn't tell how FAR the headlights were from me. I literally couldn't SEE that. I couldn't interpret distance. So I began counting. I would count tiny moments and with that, I could create an artificial frame of reference with which I could guess how far the other cars were and how fast they were moving, because I couldn't tell with my eyes any of that. It was scary, but I managed to make it work. It was very exhausting.
And to top that off, I looked funny. My right eye was often red from the constant drops, and the pupil was very large. I was thinking about going for job interviews, but I was sure they wouldn't understand about my dilated pupil and red rimmed right eye.
Medication: The prednisolone drops taste like bitter lettuce. I can taste it down the back of my throat, on the back of my tongue. They also make me feel very isolated from mankind. It's like I'm in a transparent latex bubble. I feel muted, like an emotionless shell. I also feel like people don't understand me while I'm taking the drop. I took it once an hour while awake (14-16 drops per day) for 1-2 weeks, then tapered down to 8 times a day, 7, 6, 5, 4, and then I stopped of my own volition because I could tell that the swelling was all gone. I've done this so many times that it's so familiar, the symptoms and the cessation of symptoms.
The prednisolone pill made all my swelling go away. I was having swelling in my ankles, knees, back, sternum, hips, and I was starting to get joint pain in my hands. I'm a musician, so that was utterly scary to me. But the oral prednisolone took away all swelling. The only side effects I had were increased metabolism (I already have a killer metabolism), I was hungry ALL THE TIME, and I had VERY VIVID dreams, some of them scary. It kept me from sleeping soundly at night when I was on the 40mg dose. But it made all my pain/symptoms go away.
I was on 40mg for one week, then 30 mg, then 20, then 10, then 5, then none.
Colitis:
Whenever I traveled, I got diarrhea. I also struggled with what I thought was lactose intolerance. But when I take Humira, I don't have any trouble digesting lactose.
I never thought that my "lactose intolerance" would have more to do with colitis than with lactose.
Lactose intolerance symptoms:
I would have very bad diarrhea, and I would feel "hungover" the next morning, very dehydrated and I would have trouble moving. When I ate a lot of ice cream and pizza, my tummy would hurt, and I would get very fatigued and start to go to sleep, and I would wake up with intense pain in my abdomen, and I wouldn't be able to walk very well for 30 minutes or so.
Ankylosing spondylitis symptoms:
I began having back pain back in 2005. I thought it was because I had a back injury- I hit my back on a loft while I was standing on a futon in college. My vertebrae T5-T9 were "out", and then I got really bad hip pain. I did physical therapy for 6 months, and then they let me go because I was "getting better" -- but I had all kinds of pain when I tried to sleep, and I used to be a really fast walker, but I had to stop because of my back pain. I still don't walk really fast.
I had to take 800mg of ibuprofen every 8 hours in order to survive life. I would wake up in the middle of the night, every night, in pain, and I'd have to take ibuprofen and still wouldn't sleep really well. I took the daily 2400mg of ibuprofen for 12-14 months, until I got on Humira.
Another thing about the pain: the more stress I'm under, the worse my pain will be. If my mood is bad, the pain is worse.
This latest episode of back pain started back in October 2007. I was having lots of pain at night, and for my job I was lifting 30 lb string basses all day. I was sure the pain would go away, so I did the stretches I learned from my '05 therapy, and didn't want to bother anyone with my back pain. I finally went to the doctor in March of '08, and I got physical therapy, but the effects didn't last. I would get better "in session", and then I'd wake up the next morning with pain. I also discovered that playing the bass made my back hurt more. My job entailed lifting basses and playing them to ensure they were adjusted properly. So my work worsened the situation.
I was released from physical therapy May of '08. My symptoms still weren't much better, but I was "getting better." My spine wouldn't "flex" the way it should, and I was having a lot of pain sleeping at night.
My maternal grandfather passed away Aug 24, 2008. I got on a plane that weekend and I got diarrhea really badly, which I know now was my colitis acting up. I stayed with my sister Natalie and her brand-new husband Michael for most of the three-day event, but the last night I stayed with my sister Nichole and her husband Jeff. They said some things that really upset me, and I got iritis the next day on the plane. I was sure it was nothing, though, maybe pink eye... but the next morning I couldn't see very well out my right eye. I went to the Ann Arbor Kellogg Eye Center Urgent Care, and they had the sense to get me tested for HLA-B27. I've had iritis 3 times previously in my life, once in 1998 (left eye), 1999 (right eye), and again in 2001 (left eye). In all 3 cases they started with prenisolone eye drops, then after a month of no improvement, I was given a prednisolone injection in the eye, which stopped the symptoms.
By this point, my ankles had swollen, and both knees, so it was hard to walk. I'd been to the doctor twice for this but they couldn't tell me what was wrong. It was actually the tissue connecting to the joints, not the joints themselves, so it was very confusing.
Peak AS symptoms: I couldn't bend down to pet the cat. She would greet me every morning when I left the bedroom, and she'd roll on the floor so I could pet her tummy-- but when I was having flares, I physically could not touch my toes without severe pain. I couldn't twist from side to side, I would have trouble laughing because all the spots where my ribs meet my sternum were inflamed, so it hurt to laugh. When I was in physical therapy, my physical therapist told me that my ribs were supposed to "roll" as I bent over. They weren't moving, so I was in extreme pain in my chest/back all the time. The ribs were locked in the position they are in when you are sitting upright, and when I would bend forward, they would stay in that position, which was VERY painful. Sometimes I would have trouble breathing, just asthma-like symptoms that worsened at night when the pain was worse. It felt like I couldn't take deep breaths, and if I started coughing, I would have trouble stopping coughing because I felt out of breath.
It hurt to walk. I had trouble walking up and down stairs, because my knees hurt so badly. The funny thing was, if I walked for hours, it would hurt while I was walking, but I would be in less pain later on, probably because of increased blood flow and some increased joint mobility.
My hands hurt. It felt like a searing, white hot pain in all my joints. This pain depressed me and made it hard for me to focus on anything. I would sit for hours, not really doing anything, but not wanting to move because of all the pain in my joints. The one thing that stopped my hand pain temporarily was washing dishes. The hot water and joint movement helped take the pain away for a while.
It hurt to lift things, because every joint ached, and my spine wasn't moving, so all the weight wasn't being distributed properly.
Symptom-free living:
I can bend down and pet the kitty. I can do housework without having pain. I can play the bass without pain. I can lift things and not ache for days afterward. I can sleep without chest/back pain. I can get up out of bed without pain. I can sit on the floor without fear of not being able to get back up. I can go to almost any position, lying down, etc, without fear of not being able to get up without help.
I don't have to worry about not being able to see, either up close or driving. I don't have to worry so much about what I eat, because on Humira, lactose doesn't give me symptoms.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Flex those teaching muscles.
I have two new classes starting next week, a group of 3 young ones (two girls, one boy, one of the girls plays cello, others: violin), all 6-8 years of age. So it's a true beginner class, and the music will be appropriately chosen. The focus will be on motor skills first, reading second.
The other group is 4 pre-teens (3 girls, one boy, one of the girls plays viola, others: violin), all 11-13 years of age. The focus will be on posture, of course, but with a strong reading element, and they will have learned 4-5 mildly complex pieces by the end of their time.
I have a few private music students, and those lessons are truly a joy as well-- I love watching people grow and learn, and I love being the one to facilitate their development.
The other group is 4 pre-teens (3 girls, one boy, one of the girls plays viola, others: violin), all 11-13 years of age. The focus will be on posture, of course, but with a strong reading element, and they will have learned 4-5 mildly complex pieces by the end of their time.
I have a few private music students, and those lessons are truly a joy as well-- I love watching people grow and learn, and I love being the one to facilitate their development.
Friday, January 30, 2009
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